Two Mothers

The Gift of Sharing Grief

Inner urgent voice
        Must U-turn
                Stop at new thrift store now.	                                              Now!			

Overwhelm, disorder, clutter
	Circle around twice at max.
Just keep head high, quick glance.                                                          Glance!
										
Another strong inner push again to connect and tell my story.
	My son died from the disease of addiction.
Mother-grief witnessing is the best healing salve, so I share.             Share!
										
Many, many moments of hope.  Multiple treatment programs, 
	Tough love, nights on the streets, death.
Meandering road, dead-ends, twists and turns.                                      Twists and Turns!
										
Chatty, tiny older woman opens up 
	Tells her tale of son’s recovery, fears and sorrows.
Confident, he graduates next week. Has work skills.  Will thrive.        Thrive!
									
Time stops.  Alert sounds.  She says his name.	
No way!  Is this why the U-Turn, the urgent push?
To share the name, the same name, Brett!                                                 Brett!	
										
Two mamas hugging, soul tears revealing.
	Same journey, love, loss, surrender.
Common thread of suffering and hope.                                                      Hope!
										
Was the meeting pure coincidence?
	Or an orchestrated U-Turn to warm my heart
Reminding me I am never alone?                                                                 Never Alone!
										
Choice is mine
        Tears dry with grace	 
                Power to receive love                                                                      Love!
										

Some days, the connections or communications across the veil from my son Brett, come in unexpected ways. The poem above describes such a day. I was worried about a dear family member that morning, and after the surprise encounter with the other mother whose son, named Brett, I contemplated what the ‘message’ was. I had the feeling that my son wanted to let me know he was aware of the phone call I had gotten that morning about my family member. I believe he wanted to make sure I knew he was ‘tuned in’ and that I was not alone.

Sometimes, I will desperately ‘beg’ him to show me he is close, and nothing will come through. Other times, his signs are so clear and creative it blows my mind. I’m coming to accept that just like in our shared physical life, we are always ‘connected’, while also independently sorting out and growing on our unique spiritual journey. ‘Letting go’ was never my forte with my son! LOL

Practices:

• Start a journal of ‘signs’ from your loved one. Maybe the signs seem stupid, inconsequential, debatable. But jot them down. You may start to see some patterns. Make note.

• Let your loved one know that you are open and trying to receive their messages. I’ve heard of some people who play games with their kids across the veil, offering a playful challenge to them to send creative signs.

• Be sure to acknowledge and thank your loved one for any signs or messages that came through. That will help them understand what works for you and what you notice!

• Be joyous. Our loved ones want us to be happy and feel loved. I really think our recovery in grief is the greatest gift we can offer them.